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Burn After Listening

from Jimmy Jams by Dan Cooper

/

lyrics

Bark like Groot, I don’t boop the snoot of the yoot
A lot of what I do won’t compute
Never have the right change at the toll booth
Nothing but the whole truth - A meme machine

It’s a sport to support me
and my rapport with the other-worldly
I’m phat and I’m sick, I’ve always been portly
Daunting shortly i’ll have caught forty

Naughtily summon a subtle shuffle on to the shuttle
When a sudden scuffle erupts trouble
From a dozen puffin chested ruffians
Ends just as abruptly, quite neatly really
I go back to my daydream

Looking out the window, humming something I think is cool
but you don’t

I half barf on the foot path
Captain Beefheart in a Street Fighter scarf
Calf muscles in a double stomach
Undercutting in the left lane
I’m a right pain in the buttocks
Think I just felt
I’m gonna need a bigger belt
I’ve made myself at home and help myself

Sick and tired of my own company
So I reconnect with long lost family
But when the time comes to meet I’m filled with anxiety
So I get a drunk as I can really quickly

Got to save up for this albums release
But I also want to whiten my teeth
I need new socks and pants - they’re not worth buying cheap
And it’s my turn to get the washing up liquid this week, it’s peak

I like playing at the Art Gallery
I’m doing that on Saturday
Maybe they’ll ask me to perform again
If I don’t get too drunk and swear

Not sure what to wear
Not sure anyone will even be there
I’m the only one who cares
Slide down the bannister to banish their stares
Stir by turning up in stirrups
with the hiccups
White lightning in a sippy cup

After tredding in dog muck
I’m an omlette with gone off eggs
Drop Dead Fred can only handle a mop head
To clean up my mess

Get this depression off my chest

No one’s impressed
All I do is test
All they do is shout next
Or ask for requests and mess up my set
This early birds having a lie in in his nest
You can keep your worms

I can confirm
I don’t work here anymore
My shirts on the floor
I’d rather be poor
Show me the door
Give me a number of a cab to call
Actually that I can’t afford
I’ll walk

credits

from Jimmy Jams, released December 25, 2017
Dan Cooper

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Took too long to find the eggplant emoji and now the moment's gone.

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